Family Responsibilities Before And After Marriage: We are all part of a family, whether nuclear or extended. We are greatly indebted to our parents for being a tool in bringing us into the world as well. They gave birth to us, nurtured us through infancy to childhood. They teach us how to do little chores and tasks. We adore them for their care and love during our formative years. In fact, some say we owe them; Yes we do!
According to a dictionary, responsibility is defined as a state of being responsible or answerable, as for a trust, debt or duty. That definition gives the idea of paying back what we owe our parents. Not financial though, but it gives the thought that we have the obligation to care for them. No wonder when we grow up, maybe get out of college and get our first job we set aside something from our salaries to support our parents, even our siblings. No wonder we still sometimes do groceries for them, run errands for them, even do laundry for them. We care for our siblings and try to provide assistance whenever we can.
There comes a time when every bird has to fly, so they say. There comes a time when one decided to start raising a family of their own even though they still belong to a family. So it happens that they belong to two families at once: Nuclear and extended. But which will they focus on primarily? Let us consider the pros and cons of focusing primarily on each of them.
Focusing primarily on the nuclear family
A nuclear family is a type of family which has just 2 parents and they are both living with their children. Even though the parents have lived with their extended families before, they are now married and promised to stick to each other primarily when they both took the marriage vows. Therefore, focusing primarily on the nuclear family will help couples keep true to their marriage vows.
When couples do things together, they automatically become closer to each other. If they have kids, they not only give their kids the best platform to grow up but also make the children feel loved and cherished. It is not that responsibilities toward parents and siblings will be neglected entirely, but minimizing such responsibilities will help both of them to better be committed in their marriages and be good parents to their children.
Focusing primarily on the extended family
When members of the extended family, maybe parents or siblings are of major interest, It can have its own advantages as well. It can mean a good relationship with them and also a guarantee that when troubles and difficulties arise, you will readily get help and be taken care of. In some parts of Africa, caring for extended family members is considered sacred.
As we have seen, both have their advantages and disadvantages. But the effect one will have on the other can be damaging to human relationships. It is a personal matter and setting priorities will help one make a good decision as per where to pledge allegiance.