Things to do before ending a relationship: It is unfortunate that every couple had to deal with tough situations in the relationship. Some of them have even considered ending a relationship due to things like cheating by one of their partners or the mere feeling of growing apart. However, there is a still a clique that will want to patch up things especially if there are kids involved in their relationship.
Nonetheless, ending a relationship is not an easy decision to make for either of the spouses regardless of the reasons behind it. But endings are part of life. There is no designated time as to when to end a relationship because it is never over until it is over. The following are some of the vital considerations that couples should make before throwing in the towel:
1: Seek for appropriate therapy
Consider involving a couple’s counselor who can help in facilitating communication between the two of you. There is no shame in asking for help even as an individual if the buck falls on one side. A counselor is an unbiased listener with professional skill and experience. However, he/she may not necessarily fix your problems but they can help in identifying a workable pattern to save the relationship.
2: Locate the root of the problem
Take an overhaul analysis of the relationship and try to pick on situations that are circumstantial for example trouble having a child or career transitions. They could perhaps turn out to be the problem yet they can be solved.
3: Remember your reasons for falling in love with your partner
Falling in love is more often as a result of a spark. However, the same love requires attention and nourishment given that the flames of passion tend to dwindle with time. It’s not all fairy dust and romantic dinner dates. You’re in the right relationship only if you are willing to keep the spark alive.
4: Don’t get involved in any drama
Out of bitterness, many are those who will not shut up about their marital issues. Hence they are not sure when to end a relationship. However, it is important to remain quiet and centered without making your private issues dramatic. Have a clear head if you want to be honest with your feelings.
5: Don’t get into another relationship yet
Finding another person to divert you from your troubled marriage is not a solution. If the relationship must come to an end, let be but avoid immediate active engagement in outside shenanigans. You will end up feeling guilty of why you had to end the relationship.
6: Imagine your future together and when apart
Of course there are notable differences in each of the two. Any break up will bring feelings of grief, fear, anger, regret and disappointment. You will be surprised to realize that you can still work it out.
7: Be honest with yourself and others
It is important to have some sort of reflection. Some answers to the questions that arise from the reflection are not anything we will want to embrace. Resist the push for false narratives. Be honest to your support network who will help you tap into your feelings and thoughts.
8: Try talking to each other before calling it quits
While this may sound very obvious many are those who bury their heads when the problematic moments arise. However, you need to realize that challenges will not just disappear without working on them. That said, it important to acknowledge that things are not okay, which trigger the need talk to each other.
9: How much work do you want to do?
Love is fifty-fifty hence we all have roles to play. It is not a business of tit-for-tat thus everyone must be willing to give all it takes to the relationship and to one another. But how much of this work are you taking up? Clean up your side of the street first before pointing fingers at others.
10: Know that change is healthy
While change is likely to take place once two people get into a relationship we should allow it to unfold in the best version.